The Bowling Fartathon

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by Jason on Wed Mar 11, 1998
Well I was the leader of a local Girl Scout Group yep local 613. They picked me because I am good with kids and the kids liked me. Well it was the day for our annual bowlathon. So I and my daughter, Emily, hopped into the car. We had to pick up three other girls whose parents couldn't take them.
Well, driving, Missy said "You stink". Michelle said "Oh sorry, I had peanut butter and chocolate chip cookies for breakfast." When she said that my daughter looked over at me I had a big smile on my face because I was smelling her sweet fart. and I got to smell it good because it was cold and all the windows were up. Well I told the girl that was okay. Actually I was thinking "Next time why don't you do it in my face?". Well my daughter knew what I was thinking because I smell her farts all the time.
Well anyway we got to the bowling alley and I met my group whose ages ranged from 6-8. All the parents left because they had something else to do. Well I started talking about what we are here for and stuff. Then I hear "That stinks!" and all the girls scramble away from the girl who did it -- sure enough it was Michelle, so I pulled her off to the side and said "You can do that, but just not when I am talking, okay?" I hated to say that because her farts smell so good. Well I got the girls all back together and finished my speech. Well it was time to bowl.
We bowled the first game, no sweat. Then before we started the second game we went into the eatery that they had in the bowling alley. Well they could have whatever they wanted, it was my treat. They had hot dogs, nochos, fries, a lot of gassy food. Of course at the time I didn't realize it. Well we got done everybody had had so much to eat, even me. Well we went to bowl the second game the first girl got up and when she went to bend down to release the ball -- you know how little girls bowl -- she farts. Everybody laughed. She said "Oh well, at least I got more power on the ball?" Well I was just like in shock because a little girl just farted in front of me. I couldn't smell it because I was keeping score and was too far back. Well the second girl got up to bowl and while she was leaving the ball go, one of the girls to the right of me farted and made the girl that was bowling get a gutter ball. All the girls laughed again. I myself couldn't believe I was hearing this.
Well the third girl got up bowl - normal no farting, until she came back she sat right beside me and let out a SBD -- I know because I smelled it. She looked over at me. As if to say do you like it. I gave her a yes look and she farted a loud one. Oh I was so involved in little girls' gas that I couldn't hardly concentrate on the game. I had to ask the next girl what she got. Well I mean there was farting coming from all sides of me. Finally the second game ended. I told the girls I had to go to the bathroom. I had to clear my head but as soon as I returned there it was the smell of little girls' farts. Now I had 10 girls with me and all 10 farted! Well the third game started like the second, the first girl letting out a fart as she let go of the ball.
Well we were causing a great deal of commotion at the bowling alley the clerk said "If you don't settle those girls down you will have to leave. " I am sure he smelled the gases too -- I guess he isn't a fart smeller. Well he finished saying his piece. One of the girl let out this humongus fart. He said "Get out, get out!" I had to call all the girls parents and they had to pick them up. Well I never actually told them what happened I just said they did feel like bowling that third game. On the way home I was so overwhelmed by the thought of them farting. I was in a good mood. Then my daughter who was 7 leaned over and whispered "This one is for you!" and farted. I kissed her on the forehead and whispered "Thanks, honey." Then Michelle said "I thought I was bad!" I laughed. Well needless to say, that bowling alley didn't host the Girl Scouts Bowlathon the next year. Oh well, we always had the Bowling Fartathon. I think about it every time I have a meeting.

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