Wednesday, December 28, 2011

how to pick a wedgie


Avoiding the wedgies and tips

Wedgies, the bain of women everywhere. It's not bad enough that our underwire bras are poking is the ribs all day,our high heel shoes are wrecking our feet, but then we have to add to our discomfort with what seems like miles of material gathered in between our buttocks? But what can be done you ask? Well, I will give you some hints on trying to avoid the wedgie all together, and if that isn't what you are looking for I can tell you how to pick the wedgie in many different ways.
Lets get started on how to avoid the wedgie first.
  1. Go commando- as in don't wear underwear at all. This solution should work, no material to get in the rear.
  2. Wear mens underwear- ever notice how they don't seem to have problems with wedgies? Well there is a reason, they are cut with a much larger bottom and a little more room for your rear to move around in giving it less opportunity to gather. Try this one out girls, I'm telling you won't believe the difference, just remember that they should probably be tighty whiteys as I have not tried boxers and boxer briefs so I am not sure how they will rate on the wedgie scale.
  3. Go with the perma wedge - Thong underwear. You might think I have lost my mind on this one but the reason is say to use the thong is this, women may never be able to completely fight off the wedgie, unless of course they decided to go with option one, but with chafing and stuff like that it might not be the best alternative. The perma wedge will alleviate most of the material that gathers in our rear and make for a wedgie that is not comfortable, but at least more tolerable. Also another advantage to this is that you will not have to pick this wedgie as it has nowhere else to go. I do not recommend this tip for anyone over the age of 35, I'm pretty sure it's illegal to wear thong underwear over that age, you'll just have to stick with your cotton granny panties, sorry.
  4. Tape a shoehorn to your butt- well actually it does not have to be a shoe horn, it can be anything that will fill the gap between your cheeks. You probably want to go with something temporary though as eventually you will have to remove it. Ok this one may be a bit uncomfortable but nothing will be going in between those cheeks, this could also solve other problems too, which I should not address in this hub, but I think you get the gist.
Ok, now if none of these ideas appeal to you we can get to the tips on picking the wedgie.
  1. The finger slide- This is the act of placing a finger in the elastic band around the leg of your underwear and running along the edge while slightly pulling the excess fabric from your buttocks. This is often seen at swimming pools and beaches. This is probably the most effective way to pick your wedgie, but is also the most obvious. There really isn't a subtle way to do this, someone will probably see you.
  2. The shake - This is done buy shaking your rear in order to free the trapped fabric. This one is also obvious, but on the bright side it might get you a date.
  3. The chair slide- This one involves sitting down and using what you are sitting to brace the underpants as you slide to the side opposite the side that the fabric has entered, thus freeing the fabric from it's hiding spot. This is not as effective as tip #1 but can be done with a little less suspicion.
  4. The Squat- This is when you take the stance of a football player by spreading your legs about 2-3 feet apart and do a few squats until the fabric releases. This technique does not always work, and actually sometimes make the wedgie worse. Use caution with this one.
  5. The pick- This is the easiest way to rid yourself of the wedgie, you just pick at the fabric until it releases from your bum. Effective but not very inconspicuous.
  6. The blow- This is when you have enough built up gas that you can actually blow the underwear from in between the buttocks. A warning to all who use this, it may cause a loud whistling sound. This one is probably best used at home or around you people you are comfortable with.
Now that we have covered all the ways to rid yourself of a wedgie and the different ways to pick a wedgie we can al be a little more comfortable. So don't be afraid, go ahead pick it and be proud, your butt will thank you for it.




Sunday, December 18, 2011

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Thursday, December 1, 2011

My Big Black Teddy BearbyJimandGarysgirl©

Work, work, work, work All I did was work. I had just moved out and filed divorce papers to get rid of the fungus which was my soon to be ex-white husband.

I buried myself in work to get away from him. I was making great money and thought I had a nice bundle saved to take a nice vacation when I find out that my husband has been taking money out of my dresser drawers. He goes out a few times a week with the guys but I thought he was using his money. I went into my box of money that was mine - saved from my weekly allowance.

I would borrow from it from time to time but replaced it the next paycheck and added more. The girls and I went out once a month so I know I wasn't spending it.

I caught him one night as he thought I was in the kitchen as I followed him into our room and I saw him count out the money and help himself and stuffed it into his pocket. I confronted him and he told me that the money was his too because he contributes to my weekly allowance and I told him he gets his and I get mine and I've been saving.

He slapped me across the face and told me that I was wrong.

I told him to take it all if he felt that way and since I was on to him and his cheating ways as well, I told him "Go ahead, have an extra lap dance on me or better yet, get a room and get your rocks off" and I slammed the door.

I'm glad I didn't start cooking so I took my handbag and my keys and drove to this neighborhood bar about 2 blocks from our house. I was there once or twice before but it's been a while.

I made sure that I looked ok before I went in and then walked and sat down at the bar. I ordered my usual JD on the rocks and put a $100 bill on the bar. I didn't know if I should call my best friend and ask her to join me or just stay by myself. I didn't really want her there or any of my friends.

About a half an hour went by and a large black man sat next to me. He was one of the sexiest guys I have seen up close and personal. He ordered a Bud and a shot of JD. He turned and looked my way and said "Hello" and I responded back "Hello to you". I ordered myself another JD and I heard this man tell the bartender "Put her drinks on my tab". He introduced himself to me as Ty and I told him my name was Jean. I thanked him for the drink and told him it wasn't necessary for him to pick up my tab and he said he wanted to.

We talked about things and he stopped suddenly when he saw my wedding ring on my finger and was all full of apologizes and I told him not to worry that I was getting a divorce. I took off my ring and threw it in the trash. I didn't want any memories of that slime.

Ty was build like a teddy bear and had a dimple in his right cheek. He took my hand and asked me to dance and I did. He was so cuddly and soft. I thanked him for the dance and he bent down to reach my lips and we kissed. He stood about 6'6" and I was 5'2". He put his arm around me as we headed back to the bar. He asked me if I wanted to eat and maybe go somewhere else and I said sure.

I followed him with my car a town over to this great little place that I have passed but never gone into. They serve a little bit of everything and I heard that their pastas and homemade sauces were to die for. I got penne with vodka sauce and a salad and he got a porterhouse steak and baked potato with corn on the cob. We had another drink and then while we waited for our food we danced again.

When we were done, again we kissed. I was starting to feel my drinks hit me as I didn't eat all day. As we got close to the table the light shinned on my face and he asked me what happened. When I had left the house I didn't give any thought to what I was going to look like. I told him that my husband hit me over socking away money for a trip and he told me the money was his and it wasn't really as we got allowances every week for our gas, lunch and whatever else - $ 200 each. He asked the waiter to please bag our dinners and he was taking me to his condo.

I followed him and he lead me to the door and he opened it and it was heavenly. For a man he had great taste and it was almost like what I picked out too. He put our dinners down and headed to his freezer for an ice back and ice cubes to put on my face.

I put my arms around him and told him he was like a cuddly black teddy bear and I love teddy bear. We hugged and he kissed me and begged me not to go back home. I told him I had to get my clothes and belonging and he said he would go with me but in the morning before work.

We didn't eat the dinners as we sat on his bed and kissed the way I love to kiss and be kissed - french. He started to explore my body with his hands as he started to unbutton my blouse and I started to reach for his pants. We got naked and make out on the couch and then lead me to his bedroom.

He was so kind and so gentle. His kisses were awesome to say the least and he put fire into my soul as he squeezed my 42DDD tit and sucked on the other. My nipples never got so hard so fast. I reached for his cock and it was huge - long and tick and so black. I remember taking it into my hands and then started to jerk it fast and then slow and the slow and fast and then took it in my mouth which I was dying to do.

He saw how tiny I was and was very gentle with me a he slowed and then had his hardened cock inside my freshly shaved pussy. We made love, I didn't want him to stop but he did. I could feel myself just letting loose and I felt as if I knew him for years. We went to bed after I swallowed his juices and then wore them all over my chest and face.

We went to sleep and woke up in each other's arms around 7 and he told me he didn't want me going home alone to get my things and went with me to get them later.

As we were in his pick up I sat close and I cupped my hand over the huge bulge. I saw that my husband's car was gone or he never came home the night before.

Ty told me not to be upset and told me to move out completely and move in with him but would lay low and help me out. I told him that he was like a big black teddy bear and he made me fell good and safe.

I got my divorce and I've never been happier in my life. Bear and I are talking about moving when he get his things around the house done.

We have been together for 7 years now and we have been living together for 6 of them.

I never saw my ex ever again but heard he died from a sexually transmitted disease and I told him I would make it all to him.

We both have fallen for each other and are planning to be married in July, 2012.
byJimandGarysgirl


Thursday, November 24, 2011

Heiressbyvargas111©

by Adriane Bobst

and

Homer Vargas


Scene I

Leigh was feeling a bit tired after cramming for a test the night before as she walked across campus. She crossed her arms holding her books tightly to her chest and filed into her Media Issues in American Pop Culture class. Today there was a guest lecturer on The Marketing and Effects of Hypnosis on Modern Media. In preparation, the class was to prepare a short essay on what they recognized to be effective hypnosis techniques used by the media. Leigh was proud of her essay as she turned it in. Unlike the other students, she did several hours of research on hypnosis in the media and came to several well thought out conclusions.

The man at the podium, Professor David Perlman, was good-looking, Leigh thought. As she sat only about five rows back, she was able to study him without straining. Not too good looking, where he could vain, but pleasant to look at. She guessed he was in his mid-thirties; light brown hair, understated wire rimmed glasses, maroon shirt with khaki pants. Very distinguished, she thought. She enjoyed listening to his voice. It was smooth, genuine, nice. She found herself drifting off while listening to his words.

She was snapped back into reality by the applause of the class. She quickly began clapping, feeling a bit embarrassed about not paying attention to the professor's lecture. Leigh's embarrassment was soon extinguished when she remembered her essay and how hard she worked on it. She began to walk out the doors when a voice called out, "Leigh...Leigh Walters!" She spun around to see who it was. Professor Perlman walked up to her holding her essay.

"Leigh Walters, right?" The professor asked.

Leigh was a bit taken aback. "Yeah...I mean yes, I am."

"I just wanted to say that I was impressed by your essay." Professor Perlman spoke with the same calm, relaxing tones he used during the lecture.

"I didn't know you had time to read it already," Leigh said surprised.

"Well, I looked over a couple of them before my lecture to see if I was going to be repeating things everyone already knew. I am fascinated with your conclusions and was hoping I could use some of the points brought up in your essay at a meeting I am having at my house later this evening."

Leigh was stunned. She could not believe what she was hearing. After three years of attending college and the countless hours of course work, projects and essays, she never had a professor praise her work so highly. She also had the sense like the professor was coming onto her. She had never thought of herself as a desirable girl; actually, she was rather plain looking. This was all too flattering. She softly chuckled to herself. "Sure. Yes. I have no problem with that. Um...do you need my sources?"

"Yes, that would help me." He handed Leigh his business card. "My e-mail address is on there. If you could send me those by 4:00, I would appreciate it."

"Sure. I'll take care of it as soon as I get home." Leigh felt stupid. She felt like a giddy schoolgirl. When the professor turned around and headed back to the podium, Leigh was disappointed. Not as though she really expected anything to happen, but still, a glimmer of hope was there. Her life was so uneventful since she came to school, consisting of classes, studying and being alone. She had a couple of boyfriends in the past, but no one for a long period of time. They found her boring. She felt it much easier to keep people at arms length anyway. After her parents died, leaving her a rather sizable inheritance, she always felt self-conscious, even though she did not advertise her wealth to anyone. But somehow, she found an interest in this guest lecturer, Professor David Perlman.

Leigh made a disappointing face and turned to go, when Professor Perlman approached her.

"I have an idea," he said. He looked directly into her eyes. His voice dropped slightly and he spoke softly. "Why don't you come tonight? My colleagues would love to meet you."

Leigh felt a strange sensation come over her. It was warm, calming. She felt a bit woozy. She could not take her eyes off of his. Leigh took a breath and said,

"Yes...I will."

"Go to the address listed on the card at 6:00 p.m. I will be waiting for you then." He stepped closer to her, looking down on her glazed face. "Do not be late."

"Yes ... Master."

Professor Perlman stood for a few seconds longer, then turned to gather his things at the podium. Slowly, Leigh found herself returning back to reality. She shook her head. The warm feeling had passed. "What was that?" she wondered. "I don't know," she answered herself, "but I liked it."

Scene II Leigh did not do any homework that evening, which was unusual for her. She found it easier to do homework every night, even the weekend, so she could keep on top of her studies. She was carrying over 32 credit hours this semester, two more than last semester, and with no social life, her 3.9 grade point average was the center of her pride.

Instead, after her classes Leigh went by Analiese, a boutique centered in the trendy part of town. She remembered her mother talking about going there when she needed something to wear for a special occasion. And Leigh always remembered her mother looking fabulous in whatever she purchased at Analiese. She had not thought about her parents recently. They were killed in a car accident almost six years ago. Until she was eighteen, her parents' estate was handled exclusively by the family attorney, Brad DeMarco. Leigh never really liked Mr. DeMarco. She could never put her finger on it, but she never did trust him. After Leigh took over the estate, she had not had to see or hear from Mr. DeMarco, which is just how she liked it.

Leigh came home to her apartment with a cream colored, low cut, slip style dress she purchased at Analiese. It had embellishments and lace all over the bodice. She had never thought of purchasing something so revealing in all her life, let alone spending that kind of money on it. But it felt good.

Putting the dress, she admired herself in the mirror. "Boy," she thought, "I DO look good. I have a chest and a waist. Professor Perlman is going to be impressed!" She also put makeup and perfume on and found some high-heeled shoes to wear. She could not wait to go to the meeting.

Leigh pulled her car up to the guard shack outside of the address Professor Perlman gave her. After Leigh gave her name, the guard let her in. A valet took her car at the front entrance. The house looked like an early twentieth century Tudor, not too ostentatious but well taken care of. A man came out of the house to meet her by her car, then led her into the study and asked her to wait. Leigh felt like she had a million butterflies in her stomach. She felt ridiculous again, trying to get a hold of herself. "I am going nuts over a man I had a five minute conversation with!" she thought.

She took a deep breath, turned, and saw Professor Perlman with several other people. Suddenly, she felt a chill down her spine; something was not right. Then, she recognized Brad DeMarco from the group. Her heart began to pound out of her chest. All the euphoria she felt earlier was gone.

"I am impressed. You are on time." Professor Perlman said. His voice was still smooth, but cold.

Leigh looked around and realized she was here for a reason. Everything within her told her to run as fast as she could. But she did not. She began to shiver. "What is going on?" she said softly.

"I want you to meet Victoria Sellers," Professor Perlman motioned to the woman on his left. "Of course you already know Mr. DeMarco."

"Yes." Her voice was barely above a whisper.

"You must be wondering what is going on." Professor Perlman slowly walked toward Leigh.

"The thought had crossed my mind," Leigh said through her teeth, staring at Brad DeMarco. She glanced back at the professor when he approached her.

Professor Perlman stood about a foot in front of Leigh. "You are here to undergo a...conversion, a re-awakening, a re-birth, if you will." He motioned his arms as he spoke. "The details of this are not important, at the moment. But I must say you look absolutely radiant this evening."

Leigh wondered if she should reach out and hit the professor, but before she could lift her arms, two men came beside her and forcibly grabbed her arms, then began to drag her to a door leading to a basement within the house. She saw DeMarco smile as she fought and thrashed as she was dragged down the stairs. The led to a dimly lit room with a cement floor, chains on the floor and on the walls, an unusual chair with straps and leg extensions, a metal table and a tall silver mechanical device with many colored wires coming out of it. Everything she saw in the basement was frightening and she began to thrash wildly and scream. Professor Perlman and DeMarco had followed and the Professor came up to her and took her face in his hands, looking directly into her eyes, as he did before. His face was so close to hers, he could smell the sweet scent of her perfume. Leigh's struggles ceased.

"Leigh, my love," the professor said, softly, "you must calm down. None of this is going to help you. Just accept the fact this is going to happen." Leigh's body was now limp.

Victoria Sellers approached Leigh, replacing the professor's position. "I know all this is confusing to you." She spoke softly, trying to comfort the scared girl. "But you have to understand, we are not here to hurt you, we are here to help you." Victoria took a pair of scissors and began to cut away at Leigh's dress. "We have rescued you from your horribly dull life to begin a life of happiness and ... subservience." Leigh's eyes opened wide at this. Victoria continued to snip away at Leigh's bra and underwear. "You see, my job is clinical research on various forms of mind control." Victoria motioned to the contraption in from of Leigh. "I also provide a valuable service to gentlemen seeking companionship from a woman offering compete obedience. And, in order for a woman to be completely obedient, her mind needs to be completely purged of... everything, leaving a blank space to be re-trained to be compliant and submissive to her new master." Leigh was now naked except for her shoes.

Victoria motioned to DeMarco to have a seat and watch.

"You ... you have brought me here to be re-programmed to be someone's slave?" she gasped. She looked around wildly. "Who?"

Brad DeMarco walked up to her. "Do you really have to ask that question?" He was so smug. "Not only would I get the money, but you, as well. You have no idea how long I have waited for this. I have been after you for years." He chuckled as he ran his fingers over her naked breasts. "But I know that you are repulsed by me. But, I can assure you that in a few minutes that will not matter." He turned and went back to his chair.

One of the men reached down under her legs and released a lock on the chair that spread Leigh's legs open. She looked at DeMarco who was grinning at her disgrace, being completely naked and vulnerable, waiting for her life to be taken away. Victoria bent down and put a probe in Leigh's anus, then another probe in her vagina that extended upward to touch her clitoris. Victoria then took two wires from the mainframe and plugged them into the probes. Leigh winced at the invasion. Victoria released the lock on the chair and closed Leigh's legs.

Two metal cups were places over Leigh's breasts, then held in place. Leigh could see the machine was designed to turn her into some mindless robot. She began to cry. Professor Perlman came to her again, looking into her eyes.

"Leigh, dear, this is all for the best," he said softly.

Leigh stopped crying for the moment. "For...the...best," she said, breathlessly.

"This is what you want, what you need, isn't that right?"

"Yes," she said, barely audible.

Professor Perlman nodded to Victoria to continue. Victoria placed a band around Leigh's head with numerous wires coming from it, leading to the mainframe. After making sure the apparatus was secure, Victoria places audio earphones in Leigh's ears and adjusted a careen in front of her eyes. She then went over to the mainframe and began typing in the final commands.

Just before the procedure was to begin, Professor Perlman said, "Leigh, I am so proud of you." Leigh smiled ever so slightly, and then Victoria made one final keystroke.

The probes in between her legs came to life and began to vibrate, catching Leigh off guard. Then she felt and erotic sensation in her breasts. It felt so pleasant. Her breathing deepened as the waves of pleasure began to grow within her body in sync with the lights.

Marco watched in fascination as the flashing lights drained the spark from the eyes of the plain young woman. He was still watching some time later when she climaxed and passed out.

Scene III

"Uhhhhh, that was NICE." Leigh's voice was thick with sleep and the afterglow of orgasm.

"'Nice?' I spend a half hour eating your soupy pussy and that's all the thanks I get," Victoria grinned looking up, her face glistening with Leigh's cum.

"Of course not, darling. I love to be awakened with your tongue in me. Your thanks, is this!" With surprising agility for a woman six months pregnant, Leigh twisted under the sheets and began her own attack on her bedmate's aroused sex.

"Oh, oh, ohhhh" Victoria began to gasp. "Leigh, Leigh ... Honey ...Agggg"

"Haven't you become a firecracker?" Leigh chuckled a few minutes later when the blonde's breathing had returned to normal.

Victoria pulled the younger woman closer, her slight bulge touching Leigh's swollen belly. "I don't know. I would never have believed expecting a baby made you so horny."

"I told you, you were crazy to keep saying no to him," Leigh replied, kissing her companion. "They say babies love orgasms."

"Could you two pipe down? I'm trying to sleep," David muttered, holding his eyes tightly shut.

"Oh, poor baby," Victoria said with mock sympathy. "Is our big strong man tired out from a long hard night of trying to satisfy his two horny pregnant women?" Her hand disappeared under the sheet and was answered with a gasp.

"We're soooo sorry," Leigh replied with mischief in her voice. "But who's to blame? You're the one who got us pregnant so you have to suffer the consequences. Like now!" she threatened, pulling back the sheets.

"Mmmhghgs" Victoria objected, her mouth already full of her husband's cock. Leigh thought of kneeling over David face and letting him eat her while Victoria blew him, but then had a better idea.

"OK, later," Leigh giggled, leaving the couple alone, "But save some for me!"

Pulling on a diaphanous gown and her high-heel slippers, she strolled to the top of the stairs of the mansion, looking around with satisfaction. She was glad she had done her research on Professor Pearlman before she went to his house that day. Fortunately, he and Victoria were as willing to work for her as the creep who had tried to hire them -- too cheaply -- to enslave her. Once that was settled, she agreed to a modified form of the mind control procedure -- she was happy to have her libido cranked up a few notches -- provided Victoria did too.

A night of hard sex with David and Victoria always left Leigh with quite an appetite. And, she was eating for two. She descended the stairs and strolled into the kitchen.

"What would Madam like this morning," inquired the man in uniform standing at attention by the stove.

"Oh, I think I'll start with the usual," she smiled, pulling aside the gown and opening her legs as Brad DeMarco dropped to his knees.

Comments please to: Homer Vargas via my CONTACT tab

Sunday, November 20, 2011